Being comfortable alone

Being comfortable alone

We live in a world where we can be constantly surrounded by people but we feel entirely alone. By this, I mean we can be sitting in our room, talking to multiple friends through text or messenger, but we are actually more alone than we have ever been.  I grew up during a time where you had to physically dial the phone to talk to someone if you were alone.  Then AIM was introduced and you could talk to multiple friends on the internet, then text messaging. Now we all have this insane fear of being alone. We don't know how to actually be alone because we are scared of being lonely. 

We really should learn to be comfortable alone.

 Although spending quality time with people is necessary for a fulfilling life, it's not essential to be talking to people all day long.  We should learn to be comfortable with the silence. We should learn to listen to our own thoughts.  Turn on some music, read a book or do yoga.  If you spend time alone during a day doing something that is entirely for you, you will probably learn to be more comfortable alone. You'll stop being so lonely. 

Being alone is actually not as horrible as it sounds.  

You just have to learn to be comfortable with yourself.  

In this day, it's harder to feel safe alone, and maybe that's why we all fear it.  It's interesting how we can be alone in public, but we actually CAN'T.  Look around you, anyone traveling alone, walking the street, riding the bus will probably be hooked to their phone. Even if they aren't texting someone, they are reading Facebook statuses of friends to help them feel less alone.  Loneliness is treated like a disease because no one think it's positive to be alone.

It's terrible to have a fear of being alone, but we have to realize that being alone is different than being lonely.  I don't think it's ever good to be lonely.

You can be alone without being lonely.  

You can be lonely while being around other people.  That is a result of the people you surround yourself with on a daily basis.  If the people you are calling your closest friends are making you feel lonely, perhaps you should branch out and find new friends.  You'll feel a lot better about spending time alone if you spend quality time with people who appreciate you. 

Being alone is actually healthy.

I'm not talking about staying in your room all day ignoring every single person that wants to hang out with you. Don't become a recluse. That's not healthy. I'm suggesting we all spend some time alone with ourselves for at least an hour a day. How will we ever be happy with ourselves if we never hang out alone? It's a great time to reflect and make changes within your own soul.  You will appreciate hanging out with people because you won't be relying on them for your happiness; you'll be hanging out with them for the pure enjoyment of social interaction not dependency.  

Although it's hard to be alone,  you can try just an hour a day. That's seriously all you need to do.  Put down all the distractions.  Don't watch TV mindlessly. Listen to the sound of your own breathing.  You can meditate, write in a journal or paint a picture.  Or just lay in your bed for an hour.  

Listen, you'll be surprised how many times you try to reach for your phone, but don't do it.  

You will learn to love yourself and be comfortable with yourself.

The more you learn to be OK being alone, the happier you will be in life. It will benefit the relationships you have built as well. Trust me. 

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